Baby's Sense of Safety and Security

Both parents' capacity to reflect on and understand a new baby's internal experience is what helps your child feel safe and secure in the world. The child feels understood and comforted by understanding parents. They need their parents to help them organize their feelings.

For instance: imagine a baby who grows very tired and becomes worked up. Parents can recognize the signs that their baby is overtired. They know from experience that at these times their baby is difficult to soothe and can't go to sleep. They learn over time that they can help their baby calm down enough to be able to go to sleep.

In order to understand their child's experience a parent must think about the situation from their baby's perspective: how would they feel, what would they want, and then what could be helpful? A parent who can interpret what they think their baby is feeling or what they want, will let their baby know they understand by mirroring back these feelings and intentions.

  • "Oh you're tired now, come on lets go for a little walk around the garden to help you calm down a bit."

The tone of voice, the way the parent looks at and holds their baby and the look on their face all convey to the baby that their parent understands and is able to help.